Like countless others this January, I have resolved not to resolve. For several years I have been choosing themes for the year based on my interests, dreams, goals or areas for improvement. While this method is a drastic improvement over sweeping and desperate resolutions that lead to my near-immediate sense of failure, I have found a “wrinkle in theme” too. Themes, while not easily “broken,” are easily superficial, lacking roots, shunning accountability. Take last year’s PHOTOGRAPHY theme. I took copious photos and learned oodles about the craft. What I did not do was discipline myself to create a process for tagging, organizing, saving, backing up, editing and using my photos. Why? To answer this question I was forced to consult two professionals: 1) a psychologist, and 2) a time management guru. Here is a truncated look at our sessions:
Psychologist: What I hear you saying is that your photography is creating stress and a general sense of failure. Is that correct?
Me: Well, um, er, I’m not sure that I meant it that way…
Psychologist: Right. So not only are you stressed out and failing in your chosen theme, but also you are in denial about it?
Me: Well, um, er, I’m not sure that I meant it that way…
Time Management Guru: (clears throat politely) Perhaps I can intercede, I mean interject here?
Me: Yes. Please!
TM Guru: Your stress involving your photography theme comes from the fact that you do not have time to work on your perfect organizational system, right?
Me: Right!
TM Guru: And you do not have time because?
Me: Well, um, er…
TM Guru: Right. I think I understand.
Psychologist: Miss, would you mind stepping out of the room for a moment?
Me: Well, um, er (walking out of the room)
TM Guru: You may come back in now.
Psychologist: I have permission to speak for my colleague here, and we’re almost out of time, so I’ll make this succinct. (Pause). (Sigh.) (Head Shake).
TM Guru: Frank, I’ve got this one. Britton. Facebook. Log. Off. Now. That’s it.
Me: What the heck? (she says to an empty room)
Thank goodness these guys came cheap. They told me what I already know. Resolutions. Themes. Intentions. Undulations. Simulations. Initiations. Gyrations. Smooth Moves…will all fail if I do not moderate the time I spend online. I love Facebooking – it has brought me closer to friends, family and memories. But I simply must treat social media as a yummy side dish to an already tasty life–one that has spicy goals worth pursuing. The next time you are on Facebook, think of me, only there as a treat after organizing the day’s photos, and ask me how I’m doing with that online moderation thingy.
So here goes. This year, I solemnly swear to spend less time on Facebook and more time…
Love it,Britton, and maybe we can keep track of each other doing what we want to do. I will be attending FA meetings. I could find out in your area! glad they came cheap becasue we already know what to do! elizabeth
Yes coach…FA meetings. We can Skype…and then hype the FA Skype. There is bad poetry in me today. :)
I don’t believe in New Year resolutions either! They are a straight walk into failure! Instead I determine what I would like to do not only for the current year, but just for today. Today is all I have. I can’t look into the future and predict what I will do or not do. Also, I have an issue with the word, ‘trying.” For me, saying that I will try to do something such as exercising more or my goal to quit smoking, invites failure and robs me of my positive outlook for my own future. Setting up priorities and scheduling is very important. It gives you sense of control and only you can control your time and what you choose to do with it.
Love you!
Britton after going through multiple boxes of our family picture you need to understand this lack of discipline is ingrained in your DNA. Just keep taking your cool photos and let the kids organize them when your old :) besides digital photos are much easier to keep just take a moment to lable your folders. I love the way your wrote this :)
“just take a moment to label the folders” —yes, yes, therein lies the challenge…
this moment…this very moment. Thank you for some wonderful moments together–supporting each other in love.
How timely (ha ha) a post. I avoided FB and Twitter for the longest time, not seeing their value. Now that I do see their value (and fun), I have yet to find the balance between time spent twittering away and time spent working. But of course this is not a post about social networking . . . this is a delightful post about the resolve to commit oneself to a meaningful project or goal without overstating its significance. And a reminder of what it means to be an artist, writer, mother, teacher, husband, friend. Did I leave anything out?
I have an alliterative plan for us!
Oh Britton Minor Graefensteiner, you are a hoot! I once shared my own angst at not being able to make an important decision, with a wise and wily physician who suggested: “Decide to be undecided”. Which I did. And miracle of miracles, a decision came to me in days! It seems once the pressure is off, creativity flows like manna from heaven and one is able to see a wider view of the options…
“Decide to be undecided.” It will work with everything, except, perhaps, with grocery shopping. :)
Ha! I love this post — so witty and clever. I’m smiling over here with appeciation. (Not ready to join you yet in your FB abstinence, though!) Good luck!
Abstinence!?? No, no, never, never, nu-uh, nu-uh!
Thanks Jen. :)
Ha! I tried to resolve not to make resolutions, but I just didn’t have the resolve to stick to it. What ruined everything was the idea of “theme years.” Resolved: 2012 is officially “Eskimo Pie Year.” I no longer have time for Facebook. : )