Two weeks ago I watched helplessly while my friend’s dog was attacked (again) by an unleashed one. The owner either lives in La-la Land (you know, the shiny happy place where nothing bad ever happens) or enjoys seeing his strong, fast beast tear into the necks of sweet, friendly, leashed dogs. Not only did NO ONE bother to come out of their homes to see why my friend was screaming “NO! Not again!” over and over while trying to protect her dog, but also the dog owner did nothing more than lamely apologize then yell at his dog repeatedly–expecting what, a sincere apology from the instinctual chap? What he should have done was begged forgiveness for his neglect, offered to pay for the vet visit, and then rubbed raw meat on his own neck and let his precious dog dig in. I’m incensed–can you tell?
Ok, so we can all agree that what happened was unconscionable, horrible, and worth the rant, right? But the proverbial “they” say that whatever angers us about others is because we somehow share the same weaknesses about which we complain. Now, I don’t own dogs (love them, but don’t have time to care for them properly), so I’m not a leash-law-breaker. But I do own cats, and I’ll admit that I could do a much better job of keeping their litter boxes pristine. I’m also in the business of raising children, and I do let them run off-lead on a regular basis. They have even bitten other children a time or two, but that was pre-teething, and I’m sure no skin was broken. Animal Control refused to come out (I convinced them that no, I do not bite my children), and no friends were lost in the aftermath (their kids were biters too).
And as a welcome side-bit: the guy who allowed his Dobie to walk freely turned out to be an upstanding guy who brought a body guard with him when he apologized, paid the vet bill, and offered to clean up my friend’s dog’s doo-doo for the next five years (I jest). Apparently he is an animal lover who houses multiple dogs, fish, cats and the like. Seems he just can’t say “No” when someone decides they can no longer care for their own pets. Sans-leash? Still scratching my head about that one. But at least he’s not a jerk who thrills at the sight of his dog tearing into an unsuspecting canine out for a simple piddle.
I’m mulling this word, “attack” because of what happened, but also because the next day I would be reminded that my friends and family have been viciously attacked by cancer. I’m even more incensed about this because there is no way to mitigate the reality with humor–no way to find perfect words to comfort a friend besieged by a brain tumor–no way to comfort my remaining sister over the loss of her twin–no way to comprehend the insane losses of children to strange and aggressive cancers–no way, whatsoever, to embrace the fear my friend feels every time he goes for a CAT scan to confirm that the beast has been beaten.
My friend’s dog, said the vet, was saved by her collar. Early-detection saves some with cancer. Miracles rescue others. Too many lose their battles. Our only hope is that this “Race for a Cure” starts being more about cancer and less about “riders” of profit for big companies who want to look benevolent, or potential political platforms from which moralistic mandates are levied or launched under the guise of fiscal responsibility. Like the guy who takes in strays but doesn’t leash them, isn’t it time for a bit less feigned ignorance or trumped up morality? How about a healthy dose of simply doing what is right?
I want to scream along with you (once I let the tears subside) . . . Re: the dog attack — it would seem such a simple concept — look out from the tunnel of your own circumscribed existence, see the larger picture, the world at large; place yourself in another person’s shoes BEFORE the harm is done, not after. Re: politics and the corporate greed that pay lip service to the ‘race to the cure’ — it’s a more complex scenario, and one that threatens to make cynics of us all. Like you, I like to imagine a political/corporate environment where integrity matters. This piece is a biting one (could not resist that), appropriately so. At the same time, in giving voice to what’s so terribly wrong you also give voice to what it is that really matters.
Integrity in all things powerful. It sounds like an oxymoron, but I still…I’m a tad embarrassed to admit…believe in its possibility.
I think about cancer more and more, as I am only one and a half years younger than my father was when he died of brain cancer and four and a half years younger than my mother was when she died of metastatic breast cancer. You would think that after all the years since their deaths, I would be able to peel back the bandages a little bit without feeling all the pain. That simply is not the case. All I can do is simply sit on the sidelines and hope, with you, that someone does finally win the race. The end of the race will never mean as much to me as having my parents back, but maybe it will help a future son, daughter, mother or father from putting the bandages on in the first place.
You echo my thoughts…I too am one and a half younger than my father was when he died of lung cancer. And when my sister died, I was 39…the same age she had been when her breast cancer was discovered.
The wounds…always fresh, always painful. But i remember the gifts they both left, and try my best to cherish and emulate them.
Thank you Don for your heart.
I love this piece for all the emotions it raised in me. it made me so upset about that poor dog and dastardly owner and then we go and judge before the final deed it done. he does step up and tries to make it right. I have 6 rescued cats and one dog and I feel like this guy- someone has got to do it.
And then you flip over to the issue of cancer and my emotions are pinched again. I think about all the loses to cancer and I am so sorry for yours. I have lost some close friends (one in July) and a cousin to brain cancer last year. you made me stop and think for a sec – this is in all our lives and we need to come together to do what is right.
Elizabeth, I am sorry for all of your losses–so much pain and lives cut short. I long for us to take some of the answers we know seriously enough to change the causes, and for us to figure out the rest…cat quick!
Hi, Nice to see a pretty professionally done blog on the this rich subject.